Inspiring Glitter

It’s Jake again with another update. Nancy spent her second night in the hospital last night, and it was a restful one. I’m afraid that I over-scheduled yesterday with 2 pastoral care visits with ministers from our church, University Presbyterian…actually one of them has moved on to a new church, but we have a history with him. Both visits were incredibly comforting to both Nancy and me. I was amazed at her lucidity while debating her favorite apostle, New Testament letter, and verse. You see, with the pain meds, she drifts in and out of her dreams and frequently brings the dreams with her when she wakes up. Seeing her so engaged and passionate while meeting with the pastors gave me an incredible sense of peace. In spite of the meds, Nancy remains aware of the situation. She acknowledged to the pastors some level of fear of what comes next, but she expressed a greater level comfort in her journey to come where a peace that transcends all understanding awaits her. Nancy also discussed how the deep and vast love she feels from the multitude of friends and family gives her a confident comfort. And this comfort serves as her companion on the path through the fear. She is concerned about the feelings of loss, loneliness, and deep sadness all of us will feel. Nancy’s selflessness, one of her core characteristics, easily cuts through her pain medications and hallucinations.

Because of Nancy’s exhaustion, her dear friend Wendy and I are taking shifts today sitting beside her while she sleeps. During Nancy’s 6-1/2 years of chemotherapy treatment, Wendy has re-arranged her busy schedule to make sure she can join Nancy for her appointments and her infusion treatments. Most staff in the clinic and treatment center think they’re sisters…and they practically are.

Everyone suggests to me that I sleep at home and that I make sure I’m rested and functioning, so I’m heeding the advice. The highlight of the past 2 days for me was the opportunity to get to the hospital early and eat breakfast with Nancy. She’s been awake and alert both days, and we have a chance to talk and spend time together. Yesterday, I decided to read to her the latest batch of cards. I read her one card from an online friend from the www.breastcancer.org patient support group. The friend, from California, talked about how much she has always appreciated Nancy’s willingness to honestly and constructively share with those women in earlier chapters of their cancer journeys her experiences with various treatments, drug side effects, payor questions (Nancy’s profession helped her!) in an incredibly supportive way. After reading the touching note, I handed it to her and told her, “Nancy, do you know that you inspire a LOT of people?” As she examined the beautiful and sparkly card, she responded with, “I inspire a lot of glitter.”

It was pretty adorable…and true! Nancy continues to inspire us in all aspects, and she has inspired an outpouring of glitter.

The Inspiration for Inspiring Glitter